I can’t say that I believe in “healing magic” in the broadest possible sense. Shifting the odds in your favor, sure. Reiki, I don’t know how it works but it does actually help so I’ve got to give it points for that. I light candles and send energy to people that are receptive to such things.
But what do you do when someone in your family has been diagnosed with cancer so advanced that they’re not even sure where it originated?
Well, if you’re me, you spend half the day on the edge of a panic attack because a large percentage of my obsessive thoughts sit in the “general health” section of my brain. A sudden diagnosis of cancer is probably my single worst obsessive nightmare, and as someone who’s survived a brain tumor and two “possibly pre-cancerous” tumors already, not to mention the number of people in my family who’ve survived cancer, it never stops amazing me how I can still be so god-damn terrified of something I’ve been living with this closely.
I spent the afternoon looking for patterns in songs on the radio, and then I came home and took a nap because what else could I do? I’m lighting candles. I’m calling in favors with saints and angels, because this is the Catholic side of my family.
Maybe I’m selling magic short, thinking that there’s no way I could save her with a spell or the right prayers. There’s that damn Lizard Brain saying that maybe I should pray and spell and enchant my ass off because if there’s even a tiny chance of a Hallmark-movie miracle, and I don’t take it, than it’s my fault if she dies. I know this is irrational. I know it with every fiber of my rational mind. And I still keep catching myself saying Hail Marys.
I really hate the phrase “better safe than sorry.”
… But if you know any really good rituals or spells for this kind of situation, please drop them in the comments anyway, okay?