Gauge Check: All Snakes Day

I’ve seen several posts in the pagan community referring to today as All Snakes Day. I’ve seen it attributed to Isaac Bonewits originally. I don’t hate Catholic theology enough to feel like opposing it, but I like the idea of a day celebrating serpents, so Amber and I did a small ritual honoring Jormungandr this morning.

Guess I’m still Rokkatru or whatever they like to call it at heart, huh? XD

I’m sure you’re all tired of me writing gauge checks that start with “this week at work was really busy” but man, this week at work was really busy. I felt like I was running in circles most of the week, too, between computer issues at work and a number of meetings that the new boss wanted to have.

The most annoying part was that all week long, I had an evaluation hanging over my head. When I finally got to the evaluation, it was almost completely different from what I’d been told to expect, and I was so frustrated afterward with both the test and with myself (seeing myself as a failure) that I very much wanted to engage in some wall-punching or other self-harming.

In the end it turned out that I had passed, though just barely, and that still bothers me. Good enough is never good enough for me. I keep replaying the questions I know I got wrong, the ones I looked up directly afterwards. I passed, that’s enough, and I’m working on letting it go. When the intrusive thoughts come up, I’m doing my best to let them go instead of lingering over them.

Besides, I have all kinds of new things coming up to worry about. Ostara, for one – my first holiday as an Official Druid. We haven’t decided what we’re doing yet, of course. One local grove is driving out to a place almost two hours away next weekend, and I can’t do that – even aside from the cost of gas, there’s a reasonable chance I’ll have to work next weekend. The other local protogrove, well… I emailed them through their website a week and a half ago and haven’t heard anything. Good sign, huh?

I guess we’ll see what happens.

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