Day 25 – A Dark Night

It’d be a bit more thematically appropriate on the Dark Lady’s day, but Mondays are very bad days for minor spiritual breakdowns so Saturday is a perfectly fine choice. We were at the church tonight for social time and I stepped away after dark to call to Tzymir there in the darkest part of the yard.

Maybe it’s just because it’s Saturday and I get so little response from him, but when my kid woke up screaming from a nightmare, I found myself laying with her in the dark wondering if I was even accomplishing anything with this work, and then if the fact that I was wondering about it made me feel I hadn’t accomplished much at all toward  unpacking my hangups regarding warding.

I think, intellectually, I have made progress. I know I’m doing more and asking for more overall. But tonight I feel like I’m wandering aimlessly in Tzymir’s labyrinth and I’m not sure how to get out. Gonna ask Redbird in the morning if sleep doesn’t help.

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